Excerpt from The Healthy Cookie: Unbaked

What Do You Want From Me

Written May 15th, 2007

…If we were truly able to empathize we would never say things, unintentionally at least, that would be construed as hurtful. We would never get on each others nerves and would never try each others patience… We all have our own way of dealing with things. Some want to talk, others want to run away, try and fix it, or just forget about it. There is no right or wrong here.

We will all deal, cope and react in our own ways. We all have our own history, unique unto ourselves. We have our own sensitivities, our own walls and our own boundaries. No two people share the same history, therefore feeling what someone else is feeling is virtually impossible.

There are certain things I believe we all want from the people in our lives. We all want a little support, to be loved, trusted, listened to and heard. We want to be valued and ultimately to be good to each other. How we go about sharing and showing such things can be difficult. We each define these needs uniquely and individually.

Perhaps what we really need to do is take the time and understanding to learn what the people in our lives need from us. And it likely won’t be the same or in the same way as what we need of them. It is not about treating others as we want to be treated. It is about being perceptive enough, patient enough, responsive enough, intuitive enough and open enough to be truly empathetic to the best of our ability in order to give others what they truly need. That is how we help others to heal.

And when we are asked ‘what do you want from me?’, it is our own responsibility to answer truthfully, honestly and without fear.

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